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Post by nathan livingston on Jul 15, 2009 17:38:07 GMT -5
  I ' V E N E V E R T O L D A L I E[/color] A N D T H A T M A K E S M E A L I A R[/color] P L E A S E J U S T S A V E M E F R O M T H I S D A R K N E S S[/color] [/font][/center]
Nate let his head slide into his hands, his fingers moving up and tangling themselves in his hair. He cleched his fingers into fist, pulled at his hair for a moment, then relaxed his grip, letting his hands slide down over his face, pulling at his skin.
He was exhausted; no, he was worse than exhausted. He wasn't only worn physically, but also mentally. It was hard, going around and acting like the happiest guy in the world with no problems, when really, he felt like he had all the problems in the world. And he couldn't be like normal people and just barely back off of the happiness; if he did that, people would be able to tell immediately. No, he had to make sure that he constantly had a big grin, come off as one of the most excited, hyper "adults" there ever was. If he wasn't mking people laugh, he wasn't Nate. If he wasn't being Nate, then people were obviously going to be wondering what was wrong. And he couldn't have that; if people wondered what was wrong, at first things would be all awkward, and then they would try to start asking questions, and he'd be faced with a lose-lose situation; either spill and feel guilty for putting everything on other people ad making them feel bad for him, or keep it all to himself and feel guilty for keeping it from them, and for lying and saying that nothing was wrong, he was just having a slow day for once.
Hah. For once.
The truth was, his mother was dying. His father had died a few years back from cancer, and now his mom had dimensia. She was sitting in the hospital, slowly wasting away and losing her memory. She'd forgotten almost everything, including his father, where she used to live, everything important. Nate was putting as much money as he could afford into his mom's wellbeing and healthcare, but he just couldn't avoid the inevitable; she was dying.
He stood up from where he'd been sitting on the side of his bed; he hadn't slept a bit that night. His first destination was the bathroom; he peered at himself in the mirror closely, but not at the mess of hair he was sporting. He was looking at the circles under his eyes, which were steadily growing darker; it seemed like each day they got worse. He'd only been sleeping an hour or two per night, if that, and it was really beginning to take a toll on him. He groaned; he just wasn't going to leave the house today. That was it; he was goign to "take a day off for his dogs" or something, try to find something to cheer him up so he could concentrate on that and possibly fall asleep.
He walked into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes with the palm of his hand sleepily, and then staggered over to the refrigerator, pulling it open to find... Not a lot. He deflated somewhat; well, he still had two or three eggs that he could eat for breakfast... However, upon placing a hand over his rumbling stomach, he was given the idea that that wasn't going to be enough. He walked into his room, opened up a drawer beside his bed, and pulled out a balance checkbook. Well... Considering how much he'd put in for his mom... He could buy some more, but not a lot. He'd have to seriously stop giving so much money to the hospital; there wasn't anything that they could do, he just kept paying for stupid, worthless tests and the like. She was going to die, he needed to just get over that and focus on making sure he had food for him and the dogs. He sighed and tossed the small book aside, and went to stand up, pausing when his cell phone vibrated its way off of his bedstand. He stooped quickly and caught it, checking to see who was calling. Jordyn. He really hoped she wasn't in the mood for the mall, because he sure as hell wasn't. He smiled, just to make himself sound happy for being on the phone, sighed, and slid his phone open.
"Hello?" he answered, sounding bored but otherwise somewhat happy. He flopped down on his bed, and almost immediately sat back up. Jordyn was in near hysterics. He quickly told her to head over, and hung up... Then realized how stupid that probably was. Firstly, he looked like crap. Secondly, he felt like crap. Thirdly... He was depressed, too. He had a feeling this wasn't going to make him feel much better.
He quickly pulled on a pair of jeans, leaving his feet bare, and grabbed the first shirt he saw, pulling it over his head. He didn't have time to shower, so he just straightened his bangs really quick, messed up the back of his hair, and grabbed a bandanna, tying it around his head. He didn't have much he could do about the circles under his eyes, so he'd just use his regular old excuse: He'd been going to a few too many parties recently. Pair that with a grin and he was good to go. He put his dogs in the guest room (Except for Sebastian, who might actually be good to have; he was a rather lovable little puppy) and closed the door so Jordyn wouldn't get mauled; after this, he was ready.
He waited impatiently for Jordyn to arrive, and when the knock on the door came, he threw it open and wrapped his arms tightly around Jordyn, hugging her close. "So what happened now?" he asked, pulling back and looking into her eyes, worried sick; she usually didn't break down like this. Without waiting for an answer, he pulled her in, shut the door, and wrapped her in another big, warm, comforting hug, ust in case, letting her pull back when she was ready.
Notes:
[/b] finishedd ;D Tags:[/b] Jordyn Word Count:[/b] 985 Outfit:[/b] in pic, complete with no shoes Location:[/b] Nate's house. ;D Banner Credit:[/b] CREDIT OWNER HERE[/font] Template Credit:[/b] MAKE A SCENE HANNA ! OF CAUTION TWO POINT OH![/font] [/left] [/size] |
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jordyn jaschek
  backing vocals/rhythm guitar
professional gangsta
Posts: 140
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Post by jordyn jaschek on Jul 15, 2009 19:15:53 GMT -5
I've done something so terrible I'm terrified to speak
Jordyn's body quivered, as if frozen, even with the heater blowing strong. Her knuckles were a pail white against the black steering wheel, her heart pounding. What had she done? Was she crazy? She was such a fucking idiot. Her mascara had left black streaks trailing down her cheeks where her tears had followed, one right after the other. SHe'd managed to gain some control over herself, if anything just so that she could see the road clearly and not kill herself or anyone else in the process. Her stomach was in knots. How could she have drove off like that? She had kept telling herself that she wouldn't have regrets, it was time to move on. But by the time she'd made it 10 feet out of the parking lot, she was already beginning to freak out. Was she really ready to let go of Chain? Fuck no. DId she really need to? Yes...
Letting out a shaky breath, tears beginning to form in her eyes once more. As she pulled up to a red light, she looked down at her clothes. She'd never had the chance to go home and change, so Chain's blood still covered her clothes, as well as her hands. She'd been to distracted the whole night, not too mention being passed out in the chair for who knows how long, to think of going and even attempting to clean up. She leaned forward, resting her head upon her steering wheel. A single sob escape her, the wailing beginning to bubble up inside her again. Her breath began to quicken as the hysterics tried to return, but she fought it with all she had left.
Reaching for her phone, she hit a speed dial. She couldn't be alone right now. The out come wouldn't be good if she was. She lifted the cell to her ear, listening to the ringing through the phone, waiting anxiously for Nate to pick up. She didn't want to put this all on him, she didn't want anyone's sympathy or pity. But he was one of her two closest, best friends. She really did need him right now. She hoped he would understand. Breakdowns like this occured for Jordyn every once in a blue moon. They just didn't happen. But they seemed to be coming much for frequently lately. God, Chain was destroying everything she'd worked so hard to build.
She was so thankful when Nate commanded her to come right over. Right then and there, he was the only person she wanted to be with. She needed his comfort, his support. She needed a friend to finally talk to. Everything was piling up so high in her, she couldn't hold it in much longer.
She sniffed, trying to keep a hold of herself as she continued her way to Nate's house. Pulling into the driveway, she parked the car and turned off the ignition, throwing the keys into her purse. She leaned her head back, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath, trying to calm herself. It didn't work. She sniffed, flipping down the sun visor, staring at her terrible mes of a reflection. Pulling the sleeves of her yellow hoodie over her hands, she brought them to her cheeks, rubbing them intensely, trying to rid them of the dried tears, mascara, and specks of blood on her neck. When she was done, her face felt bare, with little to no make up left on her face. She sighed. It didn't matter. This was Nate. And she knew there would be more tears to come.
She glanced down one last time at her blood splattered clothes, from all the carrying she'd done with Chain only a few hours earlier. Even just the thought that it was his blood almost sent her into another spasm of hysteria. She bit her lip, hard, fighting against the tears. Grabbing her purse, she hopped out of the car, making her way hesitantly towards his door. Could she really open up to someone? Nate would certainly be the first if that was the case. What would he do when he found everything out? Would he look at her differently? Would he be ashamed of her? Disappointed? She had no time to think of any other scenarios before she reached the door, which was already being thrown open.
Next thing she knew, she felt Nate's arms wrap tightly around her, and she fought herself to stay strong. But as he pulled her into his house and pulled her into another big hug, she finally broke, her tears breaking past and sobs shaking her tiny body violently. She gripped the back of his shirt, burying her face into his chest, just letting it all go. Years of anguish flooded through her in a matter of seconds, her heart wrenching. She couldn't stop the tears from coming, no matter how hard she tried. She'd always been strong. Even after the rape, the abortion, Chain leaving her, she had hardly cried more than a few tears. Crying was soo not her thing. But no one could pull that off for long. She'd made it 4, 5 years. 5 miserable years, and this was where it left her. Embarrassed. Lost. Confused. Hopeless. Helpless. Miserable. Pathetic. Weak. Completely, utterly broken.
She gasped for breaths, the sobs robbing her from any steady stream of air. Finally she forced herself to get a grip. What had it been? A good three minutes of bawling? She hid her face, feeling the moisture on his shirt, feeling extremely embarrassed. She felt so tiny at that moment. So vulnerable. It wasn't a feeling she'd ever been fond of. Which was why she never cried. So much for that.
She swallowed, forcing her rapid beating heart to slow, and finally began to gain deep breaths, filling her oxygen-deprived lungs. She pulled back, shaking her head, burying her face in her hands. She couldn't look at Nate. God, she didn't even know what to say to him. Why had she come here again?
Running her hands up through her hair, she glanced around, looking anywhere but at Nate's eyes, still embarrassed from her outbreak. "I don't even know..." She finally replied, her voice cracking, but she refused herself to cry. She'd done enough of that in the last 3 minutes to last her a lifetime. She swallowed, staring down at the ground. She sighed, finally submitting defeat. Slowly, her gaze finally began to raise to meet Nate's. Her blue eyes pierced through his, years of pain reflecting through them. "It's a long story..." She said finally, quietly.
But you'd expect that from me
well looky here mister Nate,
i am currently finished!
a picture’s worth a thousand words, but mine’s 1094!,
taken here at Nate's houseee
in my latest style of blue tank, yellow hoodie, black skinny jeans, old black converse, stud belt
and Remembering Sunday by All Time Low playing on the airwaves
oh, and one last thing; awwwww T.T
her car
end credits; MINE
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Post by nathan livingston on Jul 15, 2009 19:41:19 GMT -5
I ' V E N E V E R T O L D A L I E [/color] A N D T H A T M A K E S M E A L I A R[/color] P L E A S E J U S T S A V E M E F R O M T H I S D A R K N E S S[/color] [/font][/center]
As Nate held her, numerous thoughts were running through his head; firstly, where the hell did all that blood come from? She had blood all over her; her hands, her clothes... This worried him somewhat, but he was going to have to just sit there and wait it out. "It's okay, shhh..." he gently cooed, rocking back and forth and holding her in a strong grip as she cried. The fact that she had broken down like this both immensly shocked him and didn't; it didn't because he'd somewhat expected it from how she'd sounded on the phone, but it did because, well... This was Jordyn. Yeah, he'd seen her get depressed, but she generally held strong. Well, everyone had to break at some point in time... Which just made him think of himself, and made him pray to god that that time for him wasn't any time soon.
Finally, she pulled back, and he gently released her, letting his fingers rest on her shoulders lightly before dropping; she kept her head down, and he was left wondering what the hell he was supposed to do. He glanced down at her blood-caked hands, which looked rather old and dried; well, whatever had happened hadn't happened anytime recently. And it had obviously shaken her; he didn't need to look to be able to tell him that his shirt was wet. He waited patiently for her to come around to talking, because obviously she did, and tried to brace himself. He'd have to be able to deal with this, no matter how depressed he himself might have been. Jordyn needed him, and he wasn't about to back out the one time that she really, honestly came to him for help. Besides, he kenw e could deal with it; he tended to become pretty strong to help out his friends.
Finally, she came around, and he smiled. "Well, you've got a long time to tell me. But first, come on. You can tell me while we get you cleaned up, or we can wait till we're done." He wrapped his arm comfortingly around her shoulders, leading her to the bathroom and grabbing a rag, turning on the bath until the water warmed up. He ran the rag under it, squeezed it out, and then took Jordyn's hands in his own, and sponged them off quietly, prepared to listen to what she had to say, or prepared to wait. He cleaned her hands gently, looking for an injury of sorts, but didn't find any and just figured he'd wait for her to tell him what happened. Finally, he removed all of the blood, and made sure that he got any that was left on her face as well, offering up a sad little smile. He handed her a towel to dry herself off, then leaned forward and unzipped her jacket, saying, "Come on; I'm actually pretty good at fighting stains. And my jackets might be a little big on you, but they're pretty damn comfy and you can wear one until you're done."
He pulled off her jacket, washed the bloodied areas with cold water, and then grabbed a bottle of hydrogen peroxide (obviously having had some tough stains in the past) and applied it. After that, he stuck it in his washing machine, walked back to retrieve Jordyn, and took her hand, leading her to his room and sitting her down on the bed, walking to his closet and retrieving his red hoodie, handng it to her. He then sat down beside her, scooting back and crossing his legs, wrapping one of his arms comfortingly around her shoulders again and waiting for her to spill again.
Notes:
[/b] finishedd ;D Tags:[/b] Jordyn Word Count:[/b] 610 Outfit:[/b] in pic, complete with no shoes Location:[/b] Nate's house. ;D Banner Credit:[/b] CREDIT OWNER HERE[/font] Template Credit:[/b] MAKE A SCENE HANNA ! OF CAUTION TWO POINT OH![/font] [/left] [/size] |
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jordyn jaschek
backing vocals/rhythm guitar
professional gangsta
Posts: 140
|
Post by jordyn jaschek on Jul 15, 2009 20:59:55 GMT -5
I've done something so terrible I'm terrified to speak
Jordyn allowed him to lead her to the bathroom, staring down helplessly at her feet as thy walked. She felt so weak and exhausted. She couldn’t have gotten much more than a couple hours of sleep or so that night, combined with the week or more of sleepless nights as well. It was finally catching up to her, and her emotional roller coaster was draining her even more. All she wanted to do was sleep, and never wake up. Never have to deal with all the shit going on. To just forget about everything, all the pain and misery. She wanted an escape. But she knew that would never happen.
She remained silent as he began wiping off her hands, feeling much like a child being cleaned off after just been in a bunch of mud or something. However, mud was fun, blood, not so much. She closed her eyes as he wiped off any leftover blood on her face as well. She gave a gentle sigh, bowing her head when he finished, soon seeing his fingers appear at her jacket zipper. Allowing him to unzip it, she shrugged the jacket off her shoulders before he took it and went to work his magic, offering what she could manage of a thankful smile.
Jordyn finally gathered the strength to move to the sink, staring blankly at her reflection. Lifting her arms, she pulled her hair up into a ponytail. Turning the faucet on to cold, she cupped her hands underneath the freezing water, before leaning down and splashing the water up into her face. The water felt like a slap in the face, but it snapped her back into reality, also waking her up a bit. Reaching out, she grabbed a small washcloth and dried off her face.
She looked up to mirror, looking over her reflection. She could hardly recognize the girl staring back at her. Without any make-up on, the dark circles under her eyes showed even more, the days of no sleep certainly evident. It was obvious she had lost a bit of weight. There was no smile present upon her lips. No light bouncing in her eyes. No energy rushing through her small body. No, she just looked... dead. Lifeless. Blank.
She dropped her gaze from the mirror, almost frightened of the dreadful image of herself. Hearing Nate come back into the bathroom, she glanced up, seeing him return with a red hoodie. She gave a small smile, and took it, pulling it on to her small frame. She felt him take her hand and she followed after him obediently, wondering if she cld really do this. She’d never opened up to anyone, but perhaps this was what she needed. She had always been there to listen and help her friends through things, but she had never allowed them to return the favor. Seems a lot of things were changing that night.
She crawled onto the bed, instinctively moving into a tiny ball, hugging her legs close to her, making her look as small as she felt. Feeling Nate’s arm wrap around her once more, she let herself lean against him for comfort and support, taking a deep breath. Well this was it. Biting her lips, she wondered how to start.
“About 4, 5 years ago I had found this one guy in an alleyway. The lad was homeless, not much older than me. He had overdosed on drugs, attempting to commit suicide, but I had found him just in time, or so the doctor’s had said. I called 911, and the ambulance got there fast, rushing all of us to the hospital. They said I had saved his life. We stayed all night, until he woke up the next day, freaking out saying he had to get out of the hospital. So we left, and i took him back to my house. He stayed with me for a while, and we grew extremely close... He was the first guy I actually fell in love with...” Her voice broke off, her nose tingling as she felt the tears fighting to come again. She sniffed, her brows setting determinedly. She was going to get through this.
“We ended up dating for a while. But about a month or so later, things started to go downhill. Not between us, but some guys from back on the street found out about him dating me, getting free food, clothes, and shelter, and went ape shit.” She took a deep breath, ducking her head under her arms as the horrid memories replayed vividly through her mind. Goosebumps raised on her arms. She brought her head back up, staring dully ahead of her, the tears forming more and more.
“Four guys ended up cornering me... and... raped... me...” Her voice faltered, but she forced herself to swallow, and press on. “He was no where around, no where to help me. I’d screamed for him so many times but he never came... I found out later they had beat the shit out of him as well, and we wound up in the same hospital room. I guess I was unconscious for a while but I woke up a few days later. But sometimes I wish I would have never woke up...”
Jordyn pulled her legs in even closer to her. “When I woke up, he went psycho, saying he had never cared for me, he was just using me for everything. He broke my heart, and just walked away, never even looking back.” A single tear slid down her cheek, her voice cracking once again. She paused, remember all the emotions with ease. She stared blankly before her. “His name was Chain Carey...” She said quietly.
Sniffing, she tried to be strong. “A few weeks later I found out that I was pregnant with one of those bastards’ child. I was so young, there’s was no way I could be a mother, nor would I ever be able to look at that child. It would just be a constant reminder of what happened. So I had an abortion...” The tears came again, unable to hold them back at that point.
“I went back home to France, and a few years later returned, only to run into him again. I tried to act as if nothing had happened, and he seemed to do the same. I’m not sure what hurt more. The fact that I had to see him again, or the fact that he really did act like absolutely nothing happened. One thing led to another and I tried my best to let go of the past. He asked me to join a band with him and his pal Spencer, which would be present day 3 day reunion. I thought I was over him, that I could deal with all of it. But lately I’m not so sure.”
She sighed, almost feeling ashamed. “Everything’s seemed to go down hill since he started dating that Corelynn girl. He started up drugs again, after all we had done to get him off of those, after everything I had suffered to do so. And I didn’t want to admit it, I didn’t think it was the case, but I guess I got jealous of Corelynn. I thi-... I think i still love him.” Her voice cracking yet again as the sobs shook through her.
She released her legs slowly, straightening them out a bit . Resting her arms on her knees, she brought up her hands, examining where the blood had once been. “Last night Chain was high, and being the typical ass he is. But he got in a fight, and got the shit beat out of him. Unfortunately I was talking to him during it and I had to go get him. God, it was like a fucking re-run of the past,” She spat, leaning her head down and gripping her skull. “I was having so many fucking flashbacks of everything we had been through. Finding him all bloody in the middle of no where, going to the hospital, waiting in the same fucking waiting room. Fuck, he was even place in the same goddamn room! I couldn’t take it when he woke me up, and told him to hurry up and get dressed. And then he started unloading in the car, and then saying that HE was the one who killed the baby. And just saying how he’s such a horrible person and this and that. I was so sick of hearing it all. I was sick of the pain. Sick of the heartache and misery. He ended up getting out, saying he’d walk... and I let him. I never said a word. I-I just drove off. God he must hate me,” She said weakly, bringing her legs back in, burying her face in her knees. The tears spilled silently over her eye lids. Now was the moment of truth. What would Nate think? What would he say?
But you'd expect that from me
well looky here mister Nate,
i am currently finished!
a picture’s worth a thousand words, but mine’s 1485!,
taken here at Nate's houseee
in my latest style of blue tank, yellow hoodie, black skinny jeans, old black converse, stud belt
and Remembering Sunday by All Time Low playing on the airwaves
oh, and one last thing; waaaaaaaaaaah
her car
end credits; MINE
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Post by nathan livingston on Jul 16, 2009 1:07:29 GMT -5
I ' V E N E V E R T O L D A L I E [/color] A N D T H A T M A K E S M E A L I A R[/color] P L E A S E J U S T S A V E M E F R O M T H I S D A R K N E S S[/color] [/font][/center]
Nate allowed Jordyn to settle in, leaning heavily against him; obviously something was wrong. Otherwise, she wouldn't have shoed up at his house, hysterical and... Well, drenched in blood. Most people weren't okay just in hysterics, but they definitely weren't okay in hysterics and soaked in old, nasty, dried-up blood... Well, he figured it had to be better than showing up soaked in blood and not in hysterics... That might have creeped him out a bit. Might have terrified him, actually.
Sebastian hopped up on the bed with them and curled up beside them, placing his head in Jordyn's lap and staring up at her, whining lightly; he loved the little dog, who was pretty damn good and reading emotions in people.
Jordyn started speaking, and he rubbed her arm comfortingly, laying his head down on top of hers, trying to give her as much support as he could. "He was the first guy I actually fell in love with..." Uh oh... He didn't like where this was going. He wanted desperately to find another, better way to make her feel better, to keep her from being so miserable. "...Some guys from back on the street found out about him dating me, getting free food, clothes, and shelter, and went ape shit." He allowed her to pull away, burying her head in her arms, and listened, horrified. “Four guys ended up cornering me... and... raped... me...” He stared at her, horrified. Jordyn had been... Raped? And... Well, he was assuming she'd never told anyone, otherwise she probably wouldn't be unloading like this. He placed his hand on her back, gently rubbing it, but otherwise in shock.
How could she not have told anyone? He heard that when you got raped, you became extremely ashamed, but he had always thought, well... He didn't really know what he thought, or why it shocked him so much. However, his shock was nothing compared to the wave that hit him when she told him the name of the guy. Chain? No, no, this couldn't be her Chain...
She spoke then of how she'd gotten pregnant, and had an abortion, and broke down crying again. He pulled her into his arms once more, unsure of how to better help her, and frustrated about it. Sebastian circled around, crawled into his lap, and tried to snuggle up against her as best as he could, whining on occasion.
She pulled away again, staring at her hands, and felt almost awkward. He knew he was probably helping a ton just by listening - heck, scratch that, he knew he was helping, there was no way she was unloading like this and doing worse for herself. So he listened. What was he supposed to say? "Aww, jeeze, Jordyn, I had no idea." Well, you think? He tried desperately to think what he would wants omeone to say to him in that situation, but what would someone be able to say to him to make him feel better about getting raped?
She continued on with her story, explaining, as he had expected, about the blood. It wasa bot the only thing he had expected out of all of this. Finally, she fell silent, hugging her knees, and he scooted closer to her, wrapping his arms around her and picking his words carefully. "You know... This might not help too much, and I'm probably saying the totally wrong shit, but... I don't think he hates you. Considering what you've told me and what I've heard from other people, whether he's dating that Parker girl or not, no matter what he might say, he's still absolutely in love with you. He... I'm not really friends with that band, especially considering the guy's a pretty blatant homophobe and with all the This Saturday and 3 Day Reunion drama - excluding you, obviously - but I've been around him enough to know that he's - obviously - a pretty fucked-up guy. He... Doesn't seem to know what he's doing half the time. I'm not totally sure what his problem is, but... It might be that. I mean, by the sounds of this - and this is just a hunch - he..." He paused, wondering how much damage he'd already done, and figured he fuck it up too much worse, and just went with it. "It sounds like the reason he said all that shit to you and left is because he didn't want it to happen again. And that might be why he's so fucked up. I think... I'd probably do the same if I absolutely had to, just... So that wouldn't happen again, you know? So maybe he's not all bad, and he just did the only thing he could think of doing." He swallowed neverously, trying to think of how he could better explain it. "I mean... He seems, like I said, like a pretty fucked up guy... Maybe that's why? And you said he blamed the kid on himself, and... he might have been trying to guilt trip you, but it's also just as likely that he's serious. Especially if he left. I mean... If you... If you left someone like that, had to say all that stuff, and found out that they got pregnant - if you were a guy, I mean - wouldn't... wouldn't you kinda feel the same way? I... I'm not too involved, so I can't really tell you what to think, so yeah."
Okay, he'd gotten it all out. Either she'd think over it, get really depressed and feel betrayed, or... Yeah, hate him. Something like that. Suddenly, he felt a bit too nervous. "Uhm, you don't have to listen to me, though. Like I said, I'm not really involved, I don't really know. Ah, I... I want you to stay the night here tonight, I'll order some take-out or something, and... Yeah. I'll do my best to make you feel better. You uh, up to eggs? If not, then yeah. Uh, I'm... Gonna use the bathroom real quick, now before I say some more stupid stuff." He laughed nervously, and pushed Sebastian into her lap; the dog was more than willing, eager to make her feel better. "I'll be right back. Feel free to mess with whatever." He went into the bathroom, but didn't actually use it, instead just sinking onto the toilet, with the lid down, and put his face into his hands. He was right; this visit hadn't made him feel any better. However, that didn't mean that he was regretting that she had come over; on the contrary, he was kind of glad she did, so she could finally get some of that damn load off her back. He was serious about her staying over, and about everything he'd said, although he wasn't sure that it had been such good timing to side with Chain. He wasn't too fond of the guy to begin with, but this... Wow. Her story had opened up a whole new perspective there.
He got up and flushed the toilet so she wouldn't think he had just been sitting there, ran his hands under the water, and grabbed a towel, drying off his hands and heading into the kitchen. He grabbed the three eggs and made them sunny-side up; he was going to have to keep her away from his kitchen if he didn't want her worrying about him. He didn't have much food left, and he was pretty unwilling to have her worrying about him in any way while she was staying over that day. He put the eggs on a plate, made some toast, and walked inot his room, sitting down next to her and offered the plate up. "Eggs?" he asked, staring down at the plate. "If you don't like sunny side up, I'm pretty sure I can make them scrambled. Yeah, I can." Reaching his conclusion, he offered them up again, smiling.
Notes:
[/b] finishedd ;D Tags:[/b] Jordyn Word Count:[/b] 1,312 Outfit:[/b] in pic, complete with no shoes Location:[/b] Nate's house. ;D Banner Credit:[/b] CREDIT OWNER HERE[/font] Template Credit:[/b] MAKE A SCENE HANNA ! OF CAUTION TWO POINT OH![/font] [/left] [/size] |
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jordyn jaschek
backing vocals/rhythm guitar
professional gangsta
Posts: 140
|
Post by jordyn jaschek on Jul 23, 2009 19:22:26 GMT -5
I've done something so terrible I'm terrified to speak
Jordyn kept her arms wrapped around her knees as she felt Nate's arms wrap around her. She felt like a little kid at the moment, but she didn't care. She leaned into him, burying her face so only her eyes were visible over her knees. She stared straight ahead, her lower lip tucked snugly between her teeth, not bugging a millimeter. She remained quiet, so many things going through her mind, so many emotions rocketing through her. Yet oddly enough, she almost felt... Better. Relieved. Like a huge weight had been taken of her shoulders. Sure things weren't okay at that moment, but she felt a lot lighter than she had in a while. She'd been holding all that in for years now. How she'd managed so long, she would never know. If it weren't for her pride, she probably could've gone on crying for days, finally allowing the millions of tears she had never shed. But that just wasn't her style.
Her ears picked up on the sound of Nate's unsure voice, and Jordyn zoned in, listening to every word he said, thankful for the distraction from her raging emotions. She listened silently, not uttering a sound or word. The fight had completely left her. She couldn't snap even if she wanted to, like she had with everyone else. And now... She couldn't help but begin to think that Nate was right. She turned her head, burying it into the comfort of Nate's side. Perhaps he had the point. Why was it he was the only one she'd ever listened to? She knew she'd heard half of this before, but for some reason, the way Nate said it, made her really think. And the way Chain had acted, the things he had said during the numerous fights they had.... Maybe he really HAD been sincere about the things.
Jordyn had never wanted to believe what Chain had done in the past was his doing. After everything they went through, the things the said to eachother, even the look in his eyes when they were together told her that he loved her. She could never believe that he had only been using her. But after that day, when he left her, as hard as her heart told her not to believe it, her head slowly began to win the battle, convincing herself that his words were true, that he never really did care for her. And slowly her heart had turned cold. But now, looking back, perhaps she should've listened to her heart instead. God, she didn't know what to believe any more. Her eyes squeezed shut tightly, another wave of tears fighting to overcome her. She bit her lip harder, refusing to let herself cry any more than she already had the night. Instead, she just buried herself deeper into Nate, absorbing his comfort and care. She loved Nate so much. He was definitely her best friend. She trusted him with her life. And he was the one person who could always make her feel better. He was also the first person she had ever opened up to about anything. Nate truly meant a lot to her.
She gave a sigh of defeat, her body completely drained for all the emotions and stress. Hearing the sudden nervousness in his voice, Jordyn glanced up, looking deep into his eyes. Uncurling herself from her small ball, she wrapped her arms tightly around Nate, giving him a big hug. Even if he didn't think so, he was helping her more than anyone ever could, just by listening. She clung to him for a minute, before finally releasing him, attempting a small smile. "Thank you," She said quietly. She was extremely thankful he had invited her to spend the night. She didn't want to be alone, and she knew she'd just spend the hours crying herself to sleep if that were the case. If she was with Nate, she could force herself to stay strong for him, if not herself, and hide the tears like she had for so many years until now.
Watching him leave the room, her eyes adjusted to the small pup in her lap. Inhaling, she let out a slow, shaky breath and bent down, wrapping her arms around the dog, and pulling him into a big bear hug. She couldn't help but give a small smile. Even the dog was trying to comfort her. She picked him up, holding him close to her as she got up off the bed, looking around at Nate's room. Her blue eyes wandered, taking in the scene around her, until her eyes landed on a black book sprawled on the floor. Walking over, she kneeled down, setting down Sebastian. Her hand reached out, gently lifting the book. She stood up, absentmindedly glancing over the opened pages as she moved to set it back up on Nate's dresser. However, the numbers quickly caught her attention. She frowned, flipping through the book. Was this Nate's.... balance checkbook? Her eyes scanned over the most recent payouts. Why was Nate paying so much out to the hospital? And by the looks of it, he was going broke. She raised a brow. What on earth was going on? She knew she shouldn't be looking through her personal things but....
She heard footsteps making their way down the hall, soon reaching the bedroom. Jordyn glanced up as Nate walked in, ignoring the plate of food in his hands, a frown still present upon her face. She closed the book and held it up. "What's this?"
But you'd expect that from me
well looky here mister Nate,
i am currently finished!
a picture’s worth a thousand words, but mine’s 924!,
taken here at Nate's houseee
in my latest style of blue tank, yellow hoodie, black skinny jeans, old black converse, stud belt
and Remembering Sunday by All Time Low playing on the airwaves
oh, and one last thing; ickyy
her car
end credits; MINE
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